Ahhh, Neal, camp, and RAMMSTEIN!!!

Hi Steve,

I don't know if you know about, or CARE about, what Neal Schon is doing lately, but even though I am NOT the typical "I told you so" type of person, I just gotta say it this one time.....didn't I TELL YOU that he would try to beat you to the next solo album?!!  Yessss, I did.  Once he got word that YOU might be working on one, here he is, doing TWO OF THEM now.  

Wow, this guy really is a schmuck.  And that last line of the article just made me cringe.  I'm glad I don't like watching reality shows.  Never liked 'em.  Of course, the major difference regarding you doing a solo album and HIM doing one, is that YOU don't need the money as badly as HE does.  You do it because you have something to say, you found an awesome way to say it, and you love what you do...and it's YOURS to be proud of and it's MEANINGFUL to you.  

Neal, however, has a new reality-star girlfriend whose NOT QUITE EX-husband is suing Neal for $50 million bucks, so THAT is really the biggest reason he's doing 2 solo albums right now.  He doesn't want that guy touching any money from Journey, either, so he's doing his OWN music, to pay him off.  Nice.  There's really not much sincerity in that, is there?

The one GOOD thing in this entire article, is that he's working with Steve Smith again.  I think Smitty got the worst deal out of the whole thing, if you ask me.  But he's stepped up and gotten over it, and he's helping Neal out...and hopefully getting PAID to do it too...but I have always liked Steve Smith, so that's a good thing.  It just sucks that he beat you to it, ya know?  Only a man who has little or no confidence or self-esteem would play bullshit games like that with you.  Overcompensation for a tiny  schlong, is my guess.  That's usually what it is.  "Wow you drive a big truck? Sorry about your penis." (That is a bumper sticker I saw once, and it cracked me up).

JOURNEY’S NEAL SCHON REVEALS PLANS FOR TWO NEW SOLO ALBUMS

by: Matt Wardlaw 2 hours ago

Mike Coppola, Getty Images

When Journey wrapped up their latest album ‘Eclipse,’ guitarist Neal Schon still had an itch to make more music. Conveniently, a break in the action allowed him the time to knock out enough material for two new solo albums.

As Schon told Ultimate Classic Rock during an interview this past weekend, the two albums, including one thatreunites him with his former Journey bandmate, drummer Steve Smith, are very different. Schon calls the album he made with Smith “one of the most rockin’ records I’ve made.”

“I’m proud of the record, but I kind of winged it. I walked in and I didn’t have anything prepared at all. I just had an open slate with a bunch of paintbrushes [in the form of] guitars and amplifiers.”

Here’s how the album was created — Smith would come in and lay down some initial tracks for Schon to work off of. “And then I’d say ‘can you go have lunch or something for half an hour and then come back and I’ll be done.’ So I’d map it out and put a rhythm guitar down, arrange the thing the way I heard it in my head and then Steve would come back and he’d listen to it.”

“He’d write down my arrangement and then he’d go out and replay the drums to my new arrangement and a click and play it like it was a full band playing. He’s just amazing like that. And then I went back and I replayed some of the rhythm guitar [parts], some of them I kept. And then I’d start playing solos, even without bass, just freelance soloing and then I played the bass on it to go with the solos, so it came about in a different kind of way, but when you listen to it, it sounds like a really connected trio with keys here and there.“

Keyboardist Igor Len completed the lineup on the sessions for the first album, which also features a guest appearance from Jan Hammer on a couple of songs. Schon is offering a free download of ‘The Calling’ from the forthcoming album at his website.

But the story doesn’t end there: after wrapping up that album, Schon got together to record with Journey bandmate Deen Castronovo and bassist Marco Mendoza for another album that he’s mixing currently.

Clearly enthused about the collaboration, Schon calls the recorded results “slammin’” and says “it’s a power trio, really tripped out like late ‘60s/’70s, but modern too in some areas, with all of us singing. I’m singing lead on some tracks, Deen is singing lead and Marco is singing leads. (Night Ranger‘s) Jack Blades helped write almost all of the lyrics on the record with myself, Marco and Deen.”

Release plans are still in the works for both albums, but buoyed by the success of the video for Journey’s latest single ‘Resonate,’ Schon is contemplating taking a similar path by making a video for ‘The Calling’ to help draw attention to the new album he recorded with Smith prior to its release.

Schon will appear with girlfriend Michaele Salahi at the first-ever ‘How To Be A Reality Star’ event on June 23 in El Paso, Texas.

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Soooo....in other news.....

The headline I want to read next is:  "Steve Perry's newest solo album reaches platinum in 2 weeks! Kicks Neal Schon's solo album to the curb. The rivalry continues."  hehehehehehe

No, I'm only kidding about that.  I don't want you to do a solo album anymore, because that seems to be what Neal is doing, and that's just lame.  Let him have his stupid reality show star girlfriend, and his ex-Playboy bunny wife, and his court costs, and his (how many? I've lost count) ex-wives that he still pays alimony to.  Karma really does come back to bite some people right on the ass.

Okay okay,

Here's the other news.....

I am still making stuff to bring to camp.  Yes, I now have 2 brand new burn blisters on my fingers because of my stupid hot glue gun.  Trying to glue cotton balls into an ice cream cone really sucks. Have you ever tried it?  I do not recommend it.  

I don't know if I ever explained the project that I'm working on....but it's for the camp parade. We are making a parade float, which is really a 2 foot by 4 foot cart on wheels, with a long handle to pull, and this year our theme is "I Scream, You Scream, We all scream!" and we're going to toss out popsicles and ice cream in those tiny little plastic cups with a built-in spoon as we walk along the crowd on the side of the road.  Now, the concept is this....since I'm teaching a blow job class, the whole thing is going to be PHALLIC.  Picture this...

Front of cart: 2 blow up dolls...one male, one female, side by side, each wearing a "Scream-N-Cream" ice cream clerk hat (thanks to Steak-N-Shake for the free kids hats), I just covered up their logo. They will also be wearing a bright plastic kids' apron...(thanks to the Dollar Tree store)...the male's apron will have "Dick" written on it, (with a drawing of a penis at the bottom, standing erect), and the female blow up doll's apron says "Cherry On Top," with a cherry glued in the center.  They will each be holding a sign.  One will have "I Scream," and the other sign will have "U Scream" on it.  

Sides of cart:  Each side will have a large sign with "We ALL Scream" written on it, and various decorative ice cream cones and popsicles drawn on it.

Corners of cart:  Each corner will have a pre-made huge fleece covered "popsicle." There are 4 of them, orange, red, green and purple.  I have a dowel attached in the center of each one that we will nail to the back of the corner planks, and we'll cover the front of the corner planks with a balsa wood "popsicle stick." Then, I'm going to hang a garland from the top of each popsicle, that has fake fudge bars, popsicles and ice cream cones hanging from them. 

Back of cart:  Pete and I will also wear one of those kids' sized plastic aprons, with our names on them, and one of those "Scream-N-Cream" hats, as we take the frozen goodies out of the coolers that we have on the back of the carts, and toss them out at people.  I also have "swag" items, like BUBBLES in ice cream cone shapes, ice cream cone squirt guns, etc., that we'll toss to people too.

So that's our idea for the parade.  Kinda funny, huh?!  I hope people get a chuckle out of it.  Of course, the 2 blow up dolls get to go right to the pool afterwards, for people to float on. hehehehe

Anyway, I'm also making "mini hats" because lots of women like to wear them at camp.  I made the pink and black one for myself, that I showed you awhile ago, but now I'm branching out into others....here's the black and white one....with 2 different backgrounds....

 

You can see the white feathery "poof" better with the black background, and the black tulle "poof" behind it, in the photo with the white background.  The ribbon is really cool, it's got white lace around the top and bottom, and square rhinestones along the middle.

I also made a green and black hat....

I like this one because it's got butterflies and "love" on the ribbon around it, and I added a gift bow with curly ribbon on the side, with the same green colored tulle all around the brim. 

I think they are both rather cute.

I have enough stuff to make 6 hats, actually, and I have red, white, pink and purple ribbon and accessories for those.  I will attach them each to a headband, to make it easy for people to put on, and I might just sell them to people....for auction money, of course, not REAL money.  Auction money is what everybody is after, so that'll be the thing we sell them for.

Oh!! And I want to start making these too.....they are called CYBERLOX...

They are made out of "tubular crin," or tube-mesh material that bounces, kinda like tiny slinkies. You gather them together, attach them to a pony tail holder, and TAH DAH!!! You've got cool fake HAIR hanging down....and pink and black is my FAVORITE color combination, so I wear that all the time at camp.  (Not so much in my every day life).  I am not one of those "Goth" people, nor am I into "steampunk" stuff, but I do like how totally COOL these cyberlox look!!

For my blow job class, my mom is crocheting penis sleeves----to put over sex toys...especially if you have a glass dildo---those are really awesome, but hard to keep safe, so why not store them in a crocheted penis shaped sleeve?!  And you can also flip them over to add some things inside it, like a vase---blow pop suckers, condoms, etc.---as a nice gift to someone you'd like to give a blow job to.  Again, hand over that auction money!! Woo hoooo!  It'll be a hoot!!

.....you might think I am obsessed with penises.

.....and you might be right.

But, hey, it's a hobby. You MEN get to play with one every day of your life.  Me? Not so much.  So when I DO get to play with one, I make sure I have a lot of fun with it.  That's all.  Nothing wrong with that, is there?!  I'm hedonistic, healthy, happy, and horny. What can I say?!  Camp is the most awesome experience EVER, and I'm counting down the days until I get there.  I've got a huge pile of stuff on the floor in my bedroom, that I'm going to pack and get ready to bring to camp. Mostly, clothes and sexy outfits...but I know how it is, I bring this huge suitcase full of stuff, and the reality is, I wear a SARONG pretty much every day, naked underneath. hehehehehe  So I gotta go through and eliminate a lot of things, and just bring shorts, tank tops, t-shirts, and sarongs. Maybe a pair of jeans if it gets cold or rains, and a jacket.  I want to pack light this year.

I did get an email from Doug Sneyd, actually, but he didn't mention going to camp, so I'm not expecting that he will show up with Hugh Hefner.  Oh well, their poor old hearts would give out anyway so I guess they'd better just stay home and live in their vanilla world instead.  Silly old guys.

YOU on the other hand....you could come to camp.....and have a blast with me....yesssss, you could.  I fantasized about that the other day, actually.  I wouldn't tell anybody who you are, (you'd have a fake name of course), and I'd show you around, and introduce you to people, and we'd go swimming NEKKID, and all that fun stuff.....And ya know what, ya poop??  You really bloody well SHOULD go to camp with me, too, before you get too damned old to venture into such a place.  Do it now, while you still can!!  I guarantee if you do, you'll go every year of your LIFE. 

Hell, bring the lady in red if you want to, (if she can handle it), and the two of you would totally LOVE IT...of course, you're one of those super rich guys, who probably wouldn't like staying in a cabin with other people, sharing a bathroom and shower stall with them, and eating regular food in a huge mess hall with everybody 3 times a day.  Your idea of "roughing it" might be a 3 star hotel without room service, so you might not be able to deal with it.  Who knows.  Are you THAT much of a pansy ass?!  I sincerely hope not.  But, you definitely seem to be very vanilla.  I hope I'm wrong about that too, but my gut says I'm right.

Ah well, the fact of the matter is, right now I have lots of TIME on my hands lately, and frankly I'm running out of ideas to work on.  It's so strange without having a 90 year old woman around to take care of every day.  I am missing Florence.  I haven't been to visit her yet, but I will next Monday and we're planning to take her out for Mother's Day lunch too.  She's doing very well, actually, and we seem to all be "out of sight, out of mind," which is great.  She isn't lamenting about missing us, she's not asking to go home, she's just enjoying her time there, going to activities, eating and sleeping and talking to people, and just keeping busy.  I'm so glad about that.  

I figured she'd be throwing a fit about not having her cat, or packing her suitcase to come home, but she hasn't mentioned him OR going home even once the whole time she's been there.  (He, of course, meows a lot, wondering where she is). He still sleeps on her bed every night too.  Poor kitty.  I give him lots of snugglies and lovin', and pettin' and brushin'.  Pete visited Flo-Flo on Sunday, and she immediately knew who he was, showed him all around the entire place, showed him her bedroom, and not ONCE asked him to take her home with him.  She did say at one point that "she wasn't sure how long she'd be staying there," but she said everybody treats her very well and she's enjoying the activities.  That is awesome.  I'm very relieved that she's happy there.  It makes me happy to know that I can RELAX when I get to camp and NOT be worried about her.

But that leaves ME in this big house, all by myself every day---well, my mom is down in the basement apartment, but Pete is at work, and I'm just putzing around this place, wondering what the hell to do next.  So, having project stuff for camp to make with my glue gun is actually helping me get through the lonely days.  I've sewn 20 pillowcases for camp, (we cover the 2nd hand furniture in pillows), and I've gathered all the supplies for decorating the Oasis lounge area near the pool, and we're going to gather other things together in the garage so all we need to do is load it all the day before we leave.  I'm going through a checklist, and making sure we don't forget anything.

This Thursday, Pete and I are outta here for the weekend---we're going to Ohio.  There's a concert we're going to on Thursday night--RAMMSTEIN BABYYYYYYY----yeahhhh, I'm bringing some marshmallows because they spew FIRE out at everybody!! hehehehe  I don't know what the HELL they are sayin', but it's so badass COOL, who cares?!  It's gonna be sweet.  Funny and weird how I've studied the Holocaust all my life, and know a LOT about Nazis...but I still only know just a few words in German.  I really should learn that language.  That, and Hebrew too.

Ah well, then we're staying to tour the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on Friday during the day, (yeah, I know, you're most FAVORITE place on earth....NOT), but I'm curious about it.....and then Friday night, all day Saturday and part of Sunday, we'll be at the dungeon's annual "Kinko De Mayo" event.  Should be cool!  It'll definitely be an awesome weekend.  Kinda like a vacation BEFORE our official vacation.

Anyway, that's the scoop in my neck of the woods lately.  Hope you're having a good week so far and Stephen, I am serious....would you at least THINK ABOUT COMING TO CAMP?!  For cripes' sake, you've never experienced so much awesomeness---I don't CARE that you have traveled the whole world many times over, and gave concerts to millions of people, and all that "job related" stuff you used to do----I am tellin' ya, baby-my-love, CAMP is so much more AWESOME than ALL OF THAT.  I'm not kidding.  I'm not exaggerating either.  You would be blown away by it, and totally addicted.

Well, think about it, and if you want to find out more about it, click here....

Buh-bye for now, you sexy sweet, soulful and sinful man.  By the way, I watched "The Kitchen is Closed, parts 1 and 2" the other day, and it was such fun to remember your solo tour....thanks for being you, and for giving ME all kinds of warm fuzzies since the age of 10.

Love, Rebecca  your favorite kindred spirit on the East Coast!