Two of my most favorite songs of yours...ok three...!!

Ok, ok, that last entry was friggin' LONG WINDED!!! I know, I know, I'm guilty of overkill every time I get a passion to write about something.  Sigh.  I really never did the "outline" thing before writing a paper in school either, I usually put the "outline" together AFTER I wrote it all!!  So, that's one of those quirks about me and my writing style I guess.  Sorry about that.  Hope you survived it.

I have edited that long-ass thing actually---it started out at 11 pages long---and I got rid of the "dear reader" crap, (it bugged me), and I eliminated discussing Playboy and Hugh Hefner and Doug Sneyd...because, well, if I send it to them to publish, they won't discuss themselves like that....so, it's considerably shorter now.  I'm also thinking I should break it up into ONE PAGE articles with various topics, like "health benefits," and "gag reflex," and "prostate massage," as separate things.  I'm still trying to come up with other pseudonym's too, but so far I'm torn between "Dixie Normous" and "Olive Givenhed."  I just think those are funny!

Okay, onto some music..........ahhhhh yes....I need me summa dat....I need to hear YOUR VOICE.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKH6zBxbLm0

The video on this isn't so great, but "Somewhere There's Hope" is one of my favorite songs of yours, and with all the turmoil going on all around us in this world, I really felt like hearing it today.  Thank you for writing it, and for singing it with such passion, as you always do with every song you sing.

Lincoln Brewster is awesome.  He plays his heart out.  It's just amazing to watch.  I love the ending.... the two of you together, the energy is contagious...and you all by yourself...baring your soul to the world...oh my God I love you so much.  I truly do.

My other most favorite song that you sing is this one..."One More Time."  It just kills me.  Breaks my heart every time I hear it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjYyJ8EnHd0&feature=related

And they added "Don't Be Down On Me Baby" to that video, which also kills me whenever I hear it.

You just kill me, Stephen.  Absolutely kill me.

And I keep comin' back to you to be killed again and again and again.

HEYYYYY.....Lost Angels!! I haven't heard that one is a bazillion years!!! I love You Tube!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WFoCrDdjFSo&feature=related

Ok I'm throwing in one last one that just makes me die inside..."I'm Cryin'."


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtA9MAZOs74&feature=related

Dammit man, you need to put some of these awesome songs TOGETHER on one CD.  Seriously. Doesn't matter how "old" they are, they sound so amazing when put together like this...rare stuff mixed with awesome FTLOSM stuff, mixed with new stuff.....dude, you'd rake in the major serious bucks.

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Well anyway, in our world today, the shit has hit the fan.  I just LOVE waking up to a shit storm.

1. Florence, Pete's mom, just fell the other day and broke 4 of her toes on one foot. She is now in a wheelchair. Her 91st birthday is coming up in September, but she may not be healed by then to enjoy it.  I want to go visit her, but Pete seems reluctant to go.  He is the king of avoidance, and it annoys me.

2. Pete's daughter's husband's mother just learned that she has lymphoma. She starts chemo on Monday, but wow, if I ever EVER get cancer, I will NOT go on chemo, no way, no how, no sir.  That shit messes you up WAY worse than cancer does---and Kevin Chalfant's sister Melva believed in HOMEOPATHIC remedies, and a positive attitude, she refused chemo, and lived nearly 20 years with the disease.  She had it from the day I met her, and we were close friends for 15 years.  I miss her a lot.

3. So, Pete's daughter and her husband are now moving back in to live with her, to help her while she's sick. I'm afraid they might be getting on the Titanic, because if his mom dies, what happens to her house? Will they be homeless?  Does she have a will?  These are questions nobody is asking yet.

4. Of course, like an avalanche, this also means Nathan has to move out of their place too, but we don't yet have an alternative place (group home) ready to take him....the only option is for Pete's other (step) daughter, who is now taking some of her stuff to her mother's attic to store so that Nate has a place in her trailer to live. We know this situation is only temporary, but let's hope it works through the winter and by spring, hopefully either Nathan will have a job and be better, or in a group home there.

5. My Emily, (my best friend's pregnant daughter) recently started a new job at McDonald's, but a week later, her contractions started, and she was rushed into the hospital----she's not due until mid-September. This has happened 3 times in the past month, so she can't work anymore.  I tried to send her some money yesterday through Money Gram (I have been doing this for quite awhile, because she's on bed rest until the baby comes and with just her boyfriend working, it's not enough), but because of all this she never got to the DMV to renew her drivers' license on her birthday in June, so they wouldn't give the money to her.  Very frustrating.  I love that kid more than anything, and to see her hurting, to see that BABY of hers going through such stressful times, really just rips my heart out, ya know?

It seems like everybody around us is hurting. Everybody.  I feel horribly guilty and helpless, and I want so much to build a huge dome of protection for everyone we know and love, to keep the harmful world from getting in and hurting them.  I told Pete we should give everyone we know one room in our house, and just let them live here for a year so they can save their money and get on their feet again.  He said, "That would drive you absolutely crazy!"  I said, "Nah, I'll be living in an apartment somewhere else!"  He laughed about that.  But still, I would love to try and save everyone around me from struggling so much...I wish I could do more...

And the other, more nagging thought in the back of my head is, "soon it will be OUR TURN."

When a big nasty tornado hits, it will eventually make its way into your world too, not just everybody else's.  Shit storms believe in equal opportunity for destruction, they don't discriminate.  Bad things don't just happen to "everybody ELSE," in this world.  We are all connected.  We are all going to have to deal with it, WHEN it comes...not IF.

So now, like a hypochondriac, I'm wondering if I've got some kind of disease lurking inside of ME that will soon make itself known, or maybe the house we're living in will burn down, or some real nasty catastrophe will happen to US soon.....I told Pete I should renew my passport, because in November, if Romney wins the election, I'm moving my fat ass to Canada. That in itself would be a catastrophe.

Well anyway, so that's where I sit today.  We also have a friend in Manhattan---she told us recently that Rosie O'Donnell has bought a new place on her block----but she has also just told us that she and her husband are splitting up.  She's numb right now.  She says maybe she needs to "be a man, and go SAND something..." rather than just being a vulnerable, scared woman, who wants to sit down to cry.

So, everybody is hurting right now, and it really causes my heart to hurt, for real, like I'm having heart palpitations or something, it just aches.  She's a writer too, and helping me with my article ideas, so I really value her friendship, and she's funny too.  We crack each other up a lot.  I've never been to Manhattan to see her, (NY scares me...I have been there once, for one day, and that was enough)...but we keep in touch daily on Facebook and email.

It just feels like the whole world around us is crumbling into rubble, and we're the only ones so far who haven't been included in it....it's like we're in this safe bubble or something, watching it all fall apart, but not being touched by it ourselves.  I don't know how or why that is, how did WE get so lucky?  And how long will that luck sustain us without running out?  Is this how people like Mitt Romney live EVERY DAY I wonder?  Knowing that everything around them is faltering, but not being affected by it?  I don't know how they can sleep at night, if that is the case.  I really don't.

I am blessed, and I thank God for the respite from the shit storm surrounding us all.  But I also know that God doesn't discriminate either, and soon He'll be testing US with something as well.  There's no way to really prepare for it, but I don't believe in living blind either, with a false sense of security.

I guess I will go for now, but I wanted to share some songs with everyone who reads this, songs that kill me, and make me feel inspired, sad, determined, melancholy, and happy, all at the same time.

I hope you have a nice weekend Stephen.  Life has a way of working itself out, so send out a prayer or two if you have a moment, and I'll do the same for the people in our lives who need it most right now.

Love, Rebecca