Oh!! I forgot to tell you about the SKIT!!

Hi Steve,

I forgot to tell you about the talent show that Pete and I were in last week, it was a HOOT!!  I have never been in a talent show in my entire LIFE.  I was freakin' out about it, stage fright and all that, but Pete was cool as a cucumber.

Pete has this CD of Bob Rivers' parody songs, and one of them is based on "American Woman," but it's entitled, "INFLATABLE Woman."  The lyrics are really funny, and in the background you hear someone blowing up a balloon.

So that afternoon Pete says, "We should do a skit with this song."  I said, "It's a talent show, not a SKIT show...do you think they would let you?"  He said, "We can ask."  Then I asked, "Where the heck are you going to find an inflatable woman around here at this time of day?!"

He just looked at me and smiled a wicked smile.

I said, "Ohhhh noooo ya don't!"  But, that is indeed what happened.  I became the "Inflatable Woman."

Now, keep in mind, PETE is the performer, he's the one who does plays and musicals in community theater all the time---NOT ME....he's the social butterfly, the attention whore type, NOT ME....so this was NOT an easy thing for me to do.  We practiced ONCE in the hotel room, in front of 2 friends, who laughed hysterically and said we should definitely do it.  So, we signed up for the talent show and did it.

ERMAHGERD it was AWESOME!!!

Picture this...(I wish we could have videotaped it).....here's the music.....(link)....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgYT0m56gAI

Pete and I come out and get on the stage with a chair.  I am wearing a pink bra and panties with black fishnet over them, and shoes that are pink with black fishnet material over them, along with black fishnet stockings, and a tank top that has a naughty phrase on it.  I crossed my arms and hid the tank top words from the audience, because it would be revealed later on during the skit.

I sit down in the chair, all slumped over and "deflated." Pete positions himself behind me.

The song starts, and everybody in the audience starts roaring when they realize what the whole thing is all about.

Pete is behind me, blowing in my neck area, and as he's doing this, he's over-acting the heavy breathing like he's out of breath, while the lyrics are playing, and at the same time, I'm slowly moving my legs out from under me, and my arms, slowly "inflating" myself, little by little, gradually, as the song progresses.

People are hysterical, falling all over each other, laughing their heads off.  I had to force myself not to smile or giggle.  I kept a straight face, with glazed over eyes, trying to LOOK like an inflatable doll.

Eventually as the song continues, I get more and more stiff, my legs are straight out, my arms are bent at the elbows but sticking straight out, I'm leaning back on the chair as though I'm all stiff -----and as I stiffen, my tank top words are revealed as my mouth slowly opens wide....the tank top says, "Does this cock make my throat look fat?"

When the audience saw THAT, along with my mouth opening wide, they all cheered and applauded and whooped it up, and just laughed and laughed....we KILLED 'em!!

At the end of the song, the doll POPS and deflates----so I end up smacking Pete on the face as I pop, and then we both fell into a heap on the floor.

The whole place went wild.  It was friggin' hilarious.

Anyway, wish you could have seen it.  I may get Pete to have my mom videotape us doing it again, just to put on Facebook....THAT would be priceless.

Well anyway, so that's the skit.  Just wanted to jot that down before I forgot about it. You would have laughed your head off, I'm sure...everybody ELSE did!!  We are just crazy, what can I say?!

Bye for now.

Love, Rebecca